Another Lennon Post
Friday, 24 October 2003 01:58![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
apollaOK, Top of the Pops 2 tonight was a John Lennon theme show presented by Yoko Ono Lennon. I'm fairly sure it was a repeat, but even if it was I watched it, despite being on the brink of deep sleep throughout. As you can imagine, several emotions were present within me during the half hour long show.
Imagine is not my favourite song. It is not even my favourite John Lennon song. Hell, it's not even my favourite song on Imagine the album because it shares space with the achingly beautiful 'Jealous Guy'. I think it's John's concession to sugar-coated pop (He called it the sugar-coated Plastic Ono Band) which is either brave or a sell-out depending on your opinion. I love it, I really do, but it is not, in my opinion John's best song- it's just one of his more accessible solo works and requires less work to appreciate. That's important in this lowest common denominator world, I suppose. I will never ever criticise the sentiment, because I think it's something he really believed and is something I believe. Then again, there is also one moment in the promo video that gets me every time. He is sat at his famous white piano and he looks up. For a moment it feels like either I can see right into his soul or he can see into mine and it is both terrifying and beautiful. In that moment I don't feel like I can hide anything from my hero, and I feel like he isn't holding anything back as he looks at me through his orange tinted glasses from thirty-two years ago. Perhaps I'm being melodramatic, I don't know, but I do know what it feelslike.
'Jealous Guy' is different but no less beautiful in its way. As unflinching confessionals go, this is quite pretty really (except when done by Roxy Bloody Music) and from the position of Rock God, quite brave. There's a few theories as to what it's about, but I think basically it's an apology from a grown-up Lennon for the flaws he's realised he possesses, an apology perhaps to Cynthia and every other woman he's fucked over (and let's not pretend there aren't a few) and an apology perhaps for some of the earlier songs in his catalogue like 'You Can't Do That' and 'Run For Your Life'. The latter song features the following line "I'd rather see you dead little girl, than to be with another man." If you're worried, John did admit he was misguided/wrong and apologised for those angry young man lyrics later on, and I think he does so in 'Jealous Guy' too. It's a beautiful song musically, but it's beauty to me is made all the more exquisite by his absolute honesty. Even if he couldn't always be honest in other aspects of his life (being, I suspect human and not divine) he was always honest when he sang to us. This 'Jealous Guy' John is a grown-up, wiser John unafraid to be honest, unafraid to point out his own flaws and able to apologise for them. This is the John Lennon I love most of all.
And then there's other videos, none of which are new to me because John died before the MTV age and so like Morrison and Led Zep left little in the way of really great footage and such. I paid only a small amount of attention to Yoko's intros to each of them because I've heard all of what she has to say before and I'm still pissed off at her about the whole Lennon: The Musical thing... Anyway, my last point is about (Just Like) Starting Over. The video was made after he was butchered in the street outside his own home, and starts with Yoko looking out over Central Park from her window. Then there's some stuff of them in the park and I smile: After five years out of the public eye and at forty years old, my boy still struts like the rock star he is. I could do without the bits of them snogging and such, but whatever.
I don't listen to John so much anymore. It's not that I don't love his work as much anymore- in some ways I can appreciate the less straightforward stuff even more. But it got to the point once where I was on the verge of crying or something everytime I heard him and I had to step back. It's not like that anymore except with Imagine (which, when I am a rock star, I will never cover. Some things are sacred to me.) and when it finally registered a month or so ago in my pea sized brain that in Whatever Gets You Thru The Night he sings 'don't need a gun to blow your mind'. How I never noticed that before, I don't know. Perhaps the disco, jump up and dance vibes distracted me.
People have said to me that if he hadn't died, he wouldn't be the icon he is. Not true. He was an icon long before he died. What sets him apart from Paul and basically everyone else was the brutal honesty in his music, that he was prepared to make an absolute arse of himself if it meant his message got across. Hell, just that he could be bothered to try and put a message across when everyone else was starting to descent into serious drug addiction, excess and giant bloody stadium tours, makes him noteworthy. Paul was never as honest as John, shielding himself behind pretty metaphors and prettier melodies. We'll love him for that and we'll remember him forever for it, but it does not earn him icon status. He did not march for feminism when it was deeply unpopular to do so. He did not beg the world for peace even once peace and love became uncool. John didn't need to be killed to become an icon. Had he lived, well, I don't claim to know what might've been, but I like to think he'd have remained the voice of his generation and most importantly, the eighties might've been a much better place than they were.
I've just had my serious mood and serious thoughts totally wrecked by the image of a mullet wearing John Lennon in a Miami Vice-like suit like every other 60s/70s rock star did at one point... No, I don't think you'dve seen that from John... The eighties would've been a different place. Not much different necessarily, but definitely different.
On a brighter/more insane note, I've had some mad dreams lately. The other night I dreamed first that I was married to Slash. That's not a declaration of Harry/Draco love, I mean Slash, the bloody guitarist from fucking Guns N Roses. I hate Guns N Roses, and although I do think Slash was the only one with any talent (he is a decent guitarist, but not my style) and he was funny on Never Mind The Buzzcocks, what the fuck was he doing anywhere near my dreamscape? It was very weird and I thought so even as I was dreaming. It can't really have been Slash anyway- he wasn't wearing his sunglasses or hat and I'm not sure that's ever happened. Anyway, I had a second mad dream on the same night, this time it was back at secondary school and I got into a fight or something with a girl who was friends with my friends but absolutely hated me for whatever reason. Insane, I'm telling you. Then last night I dreamed of Robert Plant from a music video I saw on the internet weeks ago from like 1993 or something. I don't even now remember what happened. God knows what's coming next. Perhaps I'll be visited by the ghosts of Christmases Past Present and Future.
I really don't have anything more interesting than that to tell you. I wake up, go to shorthand, go to class, go to shorthand again, come home, piss about, go to sleep and then do it all over again. That's it. My life in a nutshell. Good night and love to you all.
Imagine is not my favourite song. It is not even my favourite John Lennon song. Hell, it's not even my favourite song on Imagine the album because it shares space with the achingly beautiful 'Jealous Guy'. I think it's John's concession to sugar-coated pop (He called it the sugar-coated Plastic Ono Band) which is either brave or a sell-out depending on your opinion. I love it, I really do, but it is not, in my opinion John's best song- it's just one of his more accessible solo works and requires less work to appreciate. That's important in this lowest common denominator world, I suppose. I will never ever criticise the sentiment, because I think it's something he really believed and is something I believe. Then again, there is also one moment in the promo video that gets me every time. He is sat at his famous white piano and he looks up. For a moment it feels like either I can see right into his soul or he can see into mine and it is both terrifying and beautiful. In that moment I don't feel like I can hide anything from my hero, and I feel like he isn't holding anything back as he looks at me through his orange tinted glasses from thirty-two years ago. Perhaps I'm being melodramatic, I don't know, but I do know what it feelslike.
'Jealous Guy' is different but no less beautiful in its way. As unflinching confessionals go, this is quite pretty really (except when done by Roxy Bloody Music) and from the position of Rock God, quite brave. There's a few theories as to what it's about, but I think basically it's an apology from a grown-up Lennon for the flaws he's realised he possesses, an apology perhaps to Cynthia and every other woman he's fucked over (and let's not pretend there aren't a few) and an apology perhaps for some of the earlier songs in his catalogue like 'You Can't Do That' and 'Run For Your Life'. The latter song features the following line "I'd rather see you dead little girl, than to be with another man." If you're worried, John did admit he was misguided/wrong and apologised for those angry young man lyrics later on, and I think he does so in 'Jealous Guy' too. It's a beautiful song musically, but it's beauty to me is made all the more exquisite by his absolute honesty. Even if he couldn't always be honest in other aspects of his life (being, I suspect human and not divine) he was always honest when he sang to us. This 'Jealous Guy' John is a grown-up, wiser John unafraid to be honest, unafraid to point out his own flaws and able to apologise for them. This is the John Lennon I love most of all.
And then there's other videos, none of which are new to me because John died before the MTV age and so like Morrison and Led Zep left little in the way of really great footage and such. I paid only a small amount of attention to Yoko's intros to each of them because I've heard all of what she has to say before and I'm still pissed off at her about the whole Lennon: The Musical thing... Anyway, my last point is about (Just Like) Starting Over. The video was made after he was butchered in the street outside his own home, and starts with Yoko looking out over Central Park from her window. Then there's some stuff of them in the park and I smile: After five years out of the public eye and at forty years old, my boy still struts like the rock star he is. I could do without the bits of them snogging and such, but whatever.
I don't listen to John so much anymore. It's not that I don't love his work as much anymore- in some ways I can appreciate the less straightforward stuff even more. But it got to the point once where I was on the verge of crying or something everytime I heard him and I had to step back. It's not like that anymore except with Imagine (which, when I am a rock star, I will never cover. Some things are sacred to me.) and when it finally registered a month or so ago in my pea sized brain that in Whatever Gets You Thru The Night he sings 'don't need a gun to blow your mind'. How I never noticed that before, I don't know. Perhaps the disco, jump up and dance vibes distracted me.
People have said to me that if he hadn't died, he wouldn't be the icon he is. Not true. He was an icon long before he died. What sets him apart from Paul and basically everyone else was the brutal honesty in his music, that he was prepared to make an absolute arse of himself if it meant his message got across. Hell, just that he could be bothered to try and put a message across when everyone else was starting to descent into serious drug addiction, excess and giant bloody stadium tours, makes him noteworthy. Paul was never as honest as John, shielding himself behind pretty metaphors and prettier melodies. We'll love him for that and we'll remember him forever for it, but it does not earn him icon status. He did not march for feminism when it was deeply unpopular to do so. He did not beg the world for peace even once peace and love became uncool. John didn't need to be killed to become an icon. Had he lived, well, I don't claim to know what might've been, but I like to think he'd have remained the voice of his generation and most importantly, the eighties might've been a much better place than they were.
I've just had my serious mood and serious thoughts totally wrecked by the image of a mullet wearing John Lennon in a Miami Vice-like suit like every other 60s/70s rock star did at one point... No, I don't think you'dve seen that from John... The eighties would've been a different place. Not much different necessarily, but definitely different.
On a brighter/more insane note, I've had some mad dreams lately. The other night I dreamed first that I was married to Slash. That's not a declaration of Harry/Draco love, I mean Slash, the bloody guitarist from fucking Guns N Roses. I hate Guns N Roses, and although I do think Slash was the only one with any talent (he is a decent guitarist, but not my style) and he was funny on Never Mind The Buzzcocks, what the fuck was he doing anywhere near my dreamscape? It was very weird and I thought so even as I was dreaming. It can't really have been Slash anyway- he wasn't wearing his sunglasses or hat and I'm not sure that's ever happened. Anyway, I had a second mad dream on the same night, this time it was back at secondary school and I got into a fight or something with a girl who was friends with my friends but absolutely hated me for whatever reason. Insane, I'm telling you. Then last night I dreamed of Robert Plant from a music video I saw on the internet weeks ago from like 1993 or something. I don't even now remember what happened. God knows what's coming next. Perhaps I'll be visited by the ghosts of Christmases Past Present and Future.
I really don't have anything more interesting than that to tell you. I wake up, go to shorthand, go to class, go to shorthand again, come home, piss about, go to sleep and then do it all over again. That's it. My life in a nutshell. Good night and love to you all.
