The Madness and The Triumph...

I could twat about wishing everyone a Happy New Year, but frankly I've got better things to talk about:

First off, I saw today Channel 4's 100 Worst Pop Songs which unlike last week's 100 Greatest Musicals was pretty much spot on. Even though I adore Paul McCartney and the Frog Chorus' 'We All Stand Together' I can understand why most people want to destroy every copy of that particular record.

I love this country for only a few reasons and all of them were shown to me tonight during this programme. Our unending supply of put-downs and our ability to stand up and say 'yeah, I bought that record at the time, but it's really fucking shit, innit?' are two of them. Our ability to make such records is less good, but I have to say a lot of the list were European in origin. This means either:
A. We hate Europe, especially their cacky music.
B. Europeans just make shit music.
I'm not sure which it is, to be honest.

Also, it's good to know that not everyone gets sucked into the pop scams foisted upon us, and that most people manage to wake up to it eventually. And just to prove my unending good taste, I don't think there were any songs I sat there and thought 'HOW could that be on the list, you bastards?'

It also informed me that the former editor of Kerrang! magazine is now apparently the editor in chief for my beloved and adored MOJO... which is odd cos I remember him being on Never Mind the Buzzcocks and being ever so slighty a bit of a knob. But he was pretty cool on Worst Songs, so I shall forgive him and hope he doesn't fuck up my favourite magazine. Can't get any worse than the time they put Gomez on the cover I guess.

Basically, during the 100 Worst Songs, I laughed harder than I have since... well, the Christmas Never Mind the Buzzcocks, which was admittedly only last Sunday. And as I thought about some truly terrible songs that weren't on the list, I was reminded of something from Pirates of the Caribbean:

Commodore Norrington: You are the worst pirate I've ever heard of.
Captain Jack Sparrow: But you have heard of me.

No publicity is bad publicity, savvy?

That said... I did catch a bit of Vh1's 100 Sexiest Stars the other day. I didn't see much of the show- I saw the reminder bit that told us that Robert Plant was at 54 and Jim Morrison at 53 and I saw that Britney and Kylie were at 2 and 1. This wouldn't be so annoying if I didn't know the results of American Vh1's poll of the same thing.

So yes, it's time for one of those posts by Clare. Long and rantsome, probably without much point and written at 3am. So don't say I haven't warned you.

( Rock and Roll is About Sex. Well, it used to be. )

The Madness and The Triumph...

I could twat about wishing everyone a Happy New Year, but frankly I've got better things to talk about:

First off, I saw today Channel 4's 100 Worst Pop Songs which unlike last week's 100 Greatest Musicals was pretty much spot on. Even though I adore Paul McCartney and the Frog Chorus' 'We All Stand Together' I can understand why most people want to destroy every copy of that particular record.

I love this country for only a few reasons and all of them were shown to me tonight during this programme. Our unending supply of put-downs and our ability to stand up and say 'yeah, I bought that record at the time, but it's really fucking shit, innit?' are two of them. Our ability to make such records is less good, but I have to say a lot of the list were European in origin. This means either:
A. We hate Europe, especially their cacky music.
B. Europeans just make shit music.
I'm not sure which it is, to be honest.

Also, it's good to know that not everyone gets sucked into the pop scams foisted upon us, and that most people manage to wake up to it eventually. And just to prove my unending good taste, I don't think there were any songs I sat there and thought 'HOW could that be on the list, you bastards?'

It also informed me that the former editor of Kerrang! magazine is now apparently the editor in chief for my beloved and adored MOJO... which is odd cos I remember him being on Never Mind the Buzzcocks and being ever so slighty a bit of a knob. But he was pretty cool on Worst Songs, so I shall forgive him and hope he doesn't fuck up my favourite magazine. Can't get any worse than the time they put Gomez on the cover I guess.

Basically, during the 100 Worst Songs, I laughed harder than I have since... well, the Christmas Never Mind the Buzzcocks, which was admittedly only last Sunday. And as I thought about some truly terrible songs that weren't on the list, I was reminded of something from Pirates of the Caribbean:

Commodore Norrington: You are the worst pirate I've ever heard of.
Captain Jack Sparrow: But you have heard of me.

No publicity is bad publicity, savvy?

That said... I did catch a bit of Vh1's 100 Sexiest Stars the other day. I didn't see much of the show- I saw the reminder bit that told us that Robert Plant was at 54 and Jim Morrison at 53 and I saw that Britney and Kylie were at 2 and 1. This wouldn't be so annoying if I didn't know the results of American Vh1's poll of the same thing.

So yes, it's time for one of those posts by Clare. Long and rantsome, probably without much point and written at 3am. So don't say I haven't warned you.

( Rock and Roll is About Sex. Well, it used to be. )

America- the Kinks aren't HARD ROCK!

Quick post:

First off, would someone please point out to America what hard rock actually is? It is not the Doors and it is not Mod twats The Kinks. It is Thin Lizzy (a shameful 51 on the list, frankly) but it isn't really Iggy Pop, who is more a punk bloke. Someone get them a dictionary.

Still, at least Whitesnake only made it to 85.

America- the Kinks aren't HARD ROCK!

Quick post:

First off, would someone please point out to America what hard rock actually is? It is not the Doors and it is not Mod twats The Kinks. It is Thin Lizzy (a shameful 51 on the list, frankly) but it isn't really Iggy Pop, who is more a punk bloke. Someone get them a dictionary.

Still, at least Whitesnake only made it to 85.