Cleopatra baby, yeah!

Argh. Today did not start well. Noisy First Years woke me up early by talking loudly outside my door. Thanks girls. I managed to get back to sleep for a little while but this was rather ruined by the dream I had. I had to help Obi-Wan Kenobi (Young Ewan Obi) find his wayward padawan Anakin. Weird, man. It was in some sort of theme park or something, a place I know I've been to in dreams before. You know when it's a dream place but you've been there before? Then before we could find him, my sodding alarm went off. And I know why I had an AotC dream too....

I came up with a fantastic idea for my birthday party. A costume thing, but everyone has to come as someone from a movie. I, of course, will be going as Cleopatra (if I can find a costume). Natasha (who I'm no longer allowed to refer to as Princess) wants to go as Padme Amidala and we were checking out pictures of her on the internet. She's decided she wants to go as her in that picnic scene from AotC. We'll probably go to the Sugarhouse (local club place). I can think of nothing better for a birthday of mine than for lots of students to stare at me and my mates bemusedly.

BAFTAs last night. A crime that Gangs didn't win Best Picture and don't even get me started on Roman Polanski. Catherine Zeta Jones was quite bizarre frankly, with that dodgy Los Angeles-via-Swansea accent she affects. Best moment though was when she got so excited she dropped the faux-LA shite she thinks we believe, broke into her real thick Welsh accent and shouted "Oggy oggy oggy! Oi oi oi!" That I respect. No point getting hoity toity with me madam- I remember your Mariette days. Michael Douglas' botox has affected his tear ducts though. Just say no, mate. Meryl Streep was SO funny when she went to accept the award for the Adaptation screenwriter though. "I'd like to spank Spike Jonze.." A great, funny lady.

Anyway, at this point (in case he's reading), I'd like to tell you that I'd be prepared to listen to Liam Neeson read from a telephone book. Just a fantastic voice, man. That was random, wasn't it?

And I've come up with an idea for my Film research essay. Academy Award winners of the 1940s. Or as my snarky teacher said "That's typically left-angle from you." And? What, should I have chosen the same as everyone else? Hello! How boring would that be? And thank you very much, but I always work very hard to be different from everyone else, and I'm not about to change that just for him.

Am v. pleased right now- just updated Windows media player to 9 or whatever. It's a bit different, but I'm pleased because I've been able to save my Tottenham Hotspur anthems off the website and make the player purple. Don't ever think I'm hard to please. I can now listen to Nice One Cyril whenever I like!!

Cleopatra baby, yeah!

Argh. Today did not start well. Noisy First Years woke me up early by talking loudly outside my door. Thanks girls. I managed to get back to sleep for a little while but this was rather ruined by the dream I had. I had to help Obi-Wan Kenobi (Young Ewan Obi) find his wayward padawan Anakin. Weird, man. It was in some sort of theme park or something, a place I know I've been to in dreams before. You know when it's a dream place but you've been there before? Then before we could find him, my sodding alarm went off. And I know why I had an AotC dream too....

I came up with a fantastic idea for my birthday party. A costume thing, but everyone has to come as someone from a movie. I, of course, will be going as Cleopatra (if I can find a costume). Natasha (who I'm no longer allowed to refer to as Princess) wants to go as Padme Amidala and we were checking out pictures of her on the internet. She's decided she wants to go as her in that picnic scene from AotC. We'll probably go to the Sugarhouse (local club place). I can think of nothing better for a birthday of mine than for lots of students to stare at me and my mates bemusedly.

BAFTAs last night. A crime that Gangs didn't win Best Picture and don't even get me started on Roman Polanski. Catherine Zeta Jones was quite bizarre frankly, with that dodgy Los Angeles-via-Swansea accent she affects. Best moment though was when she got so excited she dropped the faux-LA shite she thinks we believe, broke into her real thick Welsh accent and shouted "Oggy oggy oggy! Oi oi oi!" That I respect. No point getting hoity toity with me madam- I remember your Mariette days. Michael Douglas' botox has affected his tear ducts though. Just say no, mate. Meryl Streep was SO funny when she went to accept the award for the Adaptation screenwriter though. "I'd like to spank Spike Jonze.." A great, funny lady.

Anyway, at this point (in case he's reading), I'd like to tell you that I'd be prepared to listen to Liam Neeson read from a telephone book. Just a fantastic voice, man. That was random, wasn't it?

And I've come up with an idea for my Film research essay. Academy Award winners of the 1940s. Or as my snarky teacher said "That's typically left-angle from you." And? What, should I have chosen the same as everyone else? Hello! How boring would that be? And thank you very much, but I always work very hard to be different from everyone else, and I'm not about to change that just for him.

Am v. pleased right now- just updated Windows media player to 9 or whatever. It's a bit different, but I'm pleased because I've been able to save my Tottenham Hotspur anthems off the website and make the player purple. Don't ever think I'm hard to please. I can now listen to Nice One Cyril whenever I like!!

You Say It's Your Birthday... It's his birthday too yeah!

It's George Harrison's birthday today. And you know, a weird thing happened earlier. The last song I listened to on my walkman last night was Billy Bragg and it should've stayed on that. But! I turned it on this morning and it was George. How weird-but-cool is that?

Mind you, I'm also listening to Chas n Dave at the moment. I always seem to listen to them when I'm far away from London- In California, now here in Lancaster. I'm fairly certain that anyone not British (heck, not from London) or any younger than me knows who CnD are. Suffice to say if you've ever seen a cockney knees up in a pub (on TV or something), that's the music, pretty much.

I'm meant right now to be doing dissertation stuff- Music Nick asked to read it by the end of the week. Which would be fine were it not for the fact I haven't actually written any of it yet. Um... It's not due in until the start of Summer Term, but as my dissertation advisor, he wants to read through it and actually advise me before the Easter holidays. So I'd best be off and see if I can kick myself up the arse enough to write about Jim. I mean, I talk about him all the time, how hard can it be?

You Say It's Your Birthday... It's his birthday too yeah!

It's George Harrison's birthday today. And you know, a weird thing happened earlier. The last song I listened to on my walkman last night was Billy Bragg and it should've stayed on that. But! I turned it on this morning and it was George. How weird-but-cool is that?

Mind you, I'm also listening to Chas n Dave at the moment. I always seem to listen to them when I'm far away from London- In California, now here in Lancaster. I'm fairly certain that anyone not British (heck, not from London) or any younger than me knows who CnD are. Suffice to say if you've ever seen a cockney knees up in a pub (on TV or something), that's the music, pretty much.

I'm meant right now to be doing dissertation stuff- Music Nick asked to read it by the end of the week. Which would be fine were it not for the fact I haven't actually written any of it yet. Um... It's not due in until the start of Summer Term, but as my dissertation advisor, he wants to read through it and actually advise me before the Easter holidays. So I'd best be off and see if I can kick myself up the arse enough to write about Jim. I mean, I talk about him all the time, how hard can it be?

Mathematically practically illiterate? Would seem so.

In my possible quest to train to be a teacher (which I'll probably at least apply to. Movie stardom doesn't seem to be happening), I downloaded the programmes on canteach.gov.uk for their so-called New Labour soundbite sounding 'Benchmark Tests'. Took the literacy test. Fabbo. Only probs with stuff which IMO could've gone either way. Even the spreadsheet bit on the ICT test was cool, and I know niente about spreadsheets.

Then I took the numeracy test. Out of twenty eight, I got ten. I needed to get 60%. I don't know how many that is, but it's more than ten (See, maths Clare can do!).
The first part was listening to a chick read out mental arithmetic questions. Two out of ten, I think. I hope you're allowed to write down your workings too.

And as for the rest, I've never even seen a 'whisker' diagram before, so how am I meant to know how to use it? The last time I heard the phrase 'mean average' I was sixteen and only pretending to listen. Hell, I spent my maths lessons daydreaming about being a movie star and being able to pay someone to do maths for me. I mean, come the hell on! I can't even tell the time! What hope do I have of becoming a teacher if even Key Stage 2/3 maths is beyond me? How I got a C level GCSE I don't know. Must've had a calculator with me. How can I possibly expect to be a teacher of any sort if I'm as fucking dumb as that? I've always walked around the world feeling very smug and intelligent (I know what words like lascivious mean and I can use 'exemplify' in everyday speech). And now I know I'm wrong.

And I spent three hours (nearly) in the library today in a quest to do some of my dissertation and walked out with about three or four sides written. They're utter crap. I mean, I know more than I'd like to about Jim Morrison and I'm incapable or writing about him? I go on about him enough for God's sake! I shouldn't even be here. I should be back at home stacking shelves at Sainsburys. Just so long as they don't ask me to count what I'm stacking, I should be fine.

In short, I'm both screwed and stupid.

Mathematically practically illiterate? Would seem so.

In my possible quest to train to be a teacher (which I'll probably at least apply to. Movie stardom doesn't seem to be happening), I downloaded the programmes on canteach.gov.uk for their so-called New Labour soundbite sounding 'Benchmark Tests'. Took the literacy test. Fabbo. Only probs with stuff which IMO could've gone either way. Even the spreadsheet bit on the ICT test was cool, and I know niente about spreadsheets.

Then I took the numeracy test. Out of twenty eight, I got ten. I needed to get 60%. I don't know how many that is, but it's more than ten (See, maths Clare can do!).
The first part was listening to a chick read out mental arithmetic questions. Two out of ten, I think. I hope you're allowed to write down your workings too.

And as for the rest, I've never even seen a 'whisker' diagram before, so how am I meant to know how to use it? The last time I heard the phrase 'mean average' I was sixteen and only pretending to listen. Hell, I spent my maths lessons daydreaming about being a movie star and being able to pay someone to do maths for me. I mean, come the hell on! I can't even tell the time! What hope do I have of becoming a teacher if even Key Stage 2/3 maths is beyond me? How I got a C level GCSE I don't know. Must've had a calculator with me. How can I possibly expect to be a teacher of any sort if I'm as fucking dumb as that? I've always walked around the world feeling very smug and intelligent (I know what words like lascivious mean and I can use 'exemplify' in everyday speech). And now I know I'm wrong.

And I spent three hours (nearly) in the library today in a quest to do some of my dissertation and walked out with about three or four sides written. They're utter crap. I mean, I know more than I'd like to about Jim Morrison and I'm incapable or writing about him? I go on about him enough for God's sake! I shouldn't even be here. I should be back at home stacking shelves at Sainsburys. Just so long as they don't ask me to count what I'm stacking, I should be fine.

In short, I'm both screwed and stupid.